Recently, I witnessed a public event that unexpectedly impacted my soul.
What happened externally was one thing—but what happened internally surprised me.
I first was experiencing shock and later found myself overwhelmed by grief.
Not a surface-level sadness.
A deep, aching kind of grief that bubbled up fast and caught me off guard.
And if I’m honest?
My emotional response felt a bit “over the top.”
I’m someone who walks with others through emotional and spiritual processing every day… but this one left me shaken.
So, I made space for my own soul.
I booked a spiritual direction session—because even those who pour out need to be poured into.
And wow.
I was reminded again of the beauty and power of having someone intentionally present to the Spirit with me.
The Grief Wasn’t Just Mine
Later this week, a wise friend also popped in for a visit, then sat with me and gently observed something I hadn’t yet named:
That the grief I was experiencing might not be only my own.
She wondered:
“Is it possible that what you’re feeling is the Holy Spirit’s grief?”
Immediately… something clicked.
Yes. That was it.
The event I had witnessed wasn’t just offensive to me—it grieved the heart of God.
And because I walk closely with Him, He was letting me feel some of what He was feeling.
A Question That Undid Me (In the Best Way)
My friend then asked me a question I’ve asked countless times in coaching and ministry sessions with others:
“What does your heart need?”
This time, I was on the receiving end.
And immediately, the answer rose up:
“I need to grieve.”
So I did.
The tears came.
She didn’t fix it.
She didn’t give advice.
She simply prayed.
And sat beside me.
My dog, in perfect timing, also came and sat close.
She put her paw on my leg and licked my tears.
And I just let myself cry.
No pressure to explain.
No rush to recover.
Just permission to feel what needed to be felt… with God.
The Shift Was Noticeable
The very next day, my husband quietly commented:
“You have your joy back!”
He was right.
There had been a shift.
Not because I forced it.
But because I had made space for grief—with Jesus in the room.
Let This Encourage You
If you’ve been feeling waves of emotion that surprise you…
If grief has crept in unexpectedly…
Or if you’re feeling tender over something that others have brushed off…
Pause and ask:
“Holy Spirit, is this Your grief I’m feeling too?”
And then gently ask:
“What does my heart need?”
You may be surprised at how quickly the answer comes.
You may also be surprised by how Jesus draws near when you simply let yourself feel.
Not fix. Not theologize. Just feel—with Him.
Scripture for Reflection
“The Lord is close to the brokenhearted and saves those who are crushed in spirit.” — Psalm 34:18
“Blessed are those who mourn, for they will be comforted.” — Matthew 5:4
“Jesus wept.” — John 11:35
A Prayer to Invite God into Grief
Jesus, I don’t want to numb what You’re trying to show me.
If this grief is from You, I receive it with reverence.
Help me to sit with it and not rush past it.
Be near me in the quiet places.
Thank You for Your tenderness, Your tears, and Your presence.
Amen.
Friend, don’t underestimate the value of being loved in your pain—by God, by a friend, by a counsellor or spiritual director, even by a loyal pet.
You were never meant to carry it alone.
Here are a few helps for you:
Enjoy an encouraging word
Connect with a coach
Merri Ellen Giesbrecht / www.merriellen.com
Following and Trusting : Encountering God Out of the Box 
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